Taste and see...don't eat

Ah that feeling of pure empty... having been with mia for so long
sometimes i forget that feeling. I spend so much time filling the whole instead of just savoring it...

This morning. I ate nothing. I drank black coffee and thats it. Unfortunately i could not refrain from eating my whole lunch. Bah i need to just throw it out right when i get to work so i don't get tempted. I ate it all at once and purged it. But i didn't go on a drive at lunch to binge... thats a first. Just sat in the back with my diet soda playing with my sext new white iphone 4!! Ps. i just wanted to say that Davey Havok is the sexiest man alive!!! mmmm.

So this weekend. AH, my friend wants to go for dinner tonight. She obviously doesnt know im in an eating disorder program where i am forced to eat every night at the hospital. Since i have too much pride to tell her i am going to eat at the hospital, get rid of that and figure something out for my "second" dinner. Gag me... liturally.

Im going for drinks with Nate tomorrow afternoon... well see how that works out. And im supposed to go for drinks with this other guy... haah i sound like such a player.. drinks with all these guys in the same day! Im intrested in Nate! Not Austin. He's a friend. We will clear that up! Im going bowling Saturday night hopefully, and going to see Nate Spin at the afterhours club! (fingers crossed)

MY Dearest Rachel: It is so good to hear from you again. IN answer to your question. Yep. Ill be sticking around for a while. Things have been rough since Michelle died. thank you for being here. You. ARE> AMAZING!!

Crina- Perfecting My Emptiness... Your comment made my day! Thank you so much for your support! I look forward to getting to know you on your journey! Know that I will always be here for you as well supporting you in what you want and your goals!! Ps. you are so beautiful!!! I love your profile picture!!!!

I will update more later...

xxo.
Rach